sneak a peek
What if cinderella never made it to the ball?
what if she was writing her dissertation instead?
what if she took the only break she’s ever taken & ever thought she’d take & found the flow state between two river banks?
what if she couldn’t find the sun so she talked to the stars instead & the big dipper led her to Styx’s river where she forgot her word problems & played with Them & the dead?
in this rotpunk tinker-tale, not only is tinderella in a terrible state of decay, but her home is also in shambles.
Play|ground
A layer of clothes scaffolds Tinderella’s living room furniture, piles of porcelain dishes line the apron sink, mice scuttle to and fro at the intersection of ecru wainscot panelling and a paper-strewn hardwood floor - nothing is polished.
A silhouette labeled, “Tinderella’s Broom,” floats in the distance.
On the floor of Tinderella’s bedroom lies one-half of a battery-operated keyboard. She picks it up and places it on her lap.
Tinderella begins fiddling with one key - G5. She closes her eyes and reaches for the other half to complete the G/D chord.
She fails to feel it - it is not there.
Tinderella gets up from her rolling chair, tripping on a black Jansport backpack.
She half-sings, half-speaks the show’s first line - “What the FUUUUUUUCK” - to a haphazard one-note melody only audible from her light blue headphones.
She reaches the basement door and opens it.
Suddenly, an organ-fueled sonic earthquake and Rocky Horror-reminiscent thunderstorm rock the house. As if by magic, everything disappears.
Tinderella has entered The Void.
costume change
Mary Mags: Yeah, we just wanted you to get those costumes so you’d finally feel hot and realize you weren’t doomed to look like…
Lilith: …every guy you’ve ever hooked up with.
Pan: …a men’s American Eagle ad.
Lilith: Are you responsible for all the “Wonderwall”?
Pan: No, and I don't even want to say, “I wish I was.”
[Loki dancing in the background.]
[Mary Mags, Lilith, & Pan roll their eyes.]
Tinderella: Okay, okay, okay - so, FINE, I learned that when you hook up with a shit ton of guys playing guitar, singing “Wonderwall,” that you might actually just want to be the guy playing guitar and singing “Wonderwall”…we can move on now.
